Rebuilding Trust: Leading with Mercy and Patience

As men in leadership—whether at home, in the workplace, or in ministry—we are bound to fall short at times. We make mistakes, hurt those we care about, and sometimes damage the trust others have in us. When that happens, it can be easy to grow impatient (especially as men), wanting everything to be restored quickly. Trust takes time, and more importantly, it takes mercy. I heard it once said that trust takes years to build and seconds to destroy.

Jude, the brother of James, reminds us in Jude 1:22, “Be merciful to those who doubt.” Jude is reminding us of the importance of perseverance with others who don’t think like us (now), This verse is a powerful call for patience, especially when we’ve failed and are working to regain credibility. Maybe you’ve been working hard and walking along path of integrity now for quite some time but others around you still doubt. Whether it’s our spouse, children, employees, or friends, people may struggle to trust our words, actions, or even our faith after we’ve messed up. It’s tempting to get frustrated and demand that they believe in our sincerity, but true leadership means showing mercy—giving them time and space to heal while consistently walking in integrity.

Rebuilding trust isn’t about saying the right things; it’s about living differently, usually for a long period of time. We must be faithful in the small moments, proving through our actions that we are committed to change. That will mean listening more than speaking, accepting skepticism without defensiveness, and allowing God to shape our character instead of trying to control how others see us.

Just as Christ is patient with us, we must be patient with those who doubt.

Instead of forcing trust, we earn it through humility, consistency, and genuine love. Leadership isn’t about never falling—it’s about getting back up with grace and showing others the mercy we have received from Jesus.

If you’re in the process of rebuilding trust, stay the course. Let your actions speak louder than your words, and above all, extend the same mercy to others that God has extended to you. And let’s talk about setting you up with a plan. You’re not meant to walk this journey alone.